Friday, March 15, 2013

They Say Everyone Has an Inner Ninja Turtle

We all know those individuals who make us question the human race. The things that come out of their mouth either make you laugh hysterically or make you want to kill a kitten. Thankfully, my career gives me the opportunity to work with so many of these individuals that just love to entertain me on the daily.

Like my coworker who, while explaining a parent's belligerent behavior said, "Well, they say everyone has an inner Ninja Turtle. It's a scientific fact." ....what's that supposed to mean?

Or the endless unwanted information I'm given daily...

Me: "Hello, is so-and-so available?
Dad: "That my baby momma. She don't live here no more. See, CPS got her for child abuse and....." *five minutes and details I shouldn't know later* " that's why she ain't here."
Me: "Well, I'm sorry you're dealing with that. I just called because I noticed your child isn't in school today....."

Mom: "So-and-so isn't going to be in class today because she's so constipated she's been throwing up all night. There's vomit all over my bathroom right now."
Me: "....I'm sorry to hear that."

Or how about those really great voicemails on consumer's phones?

*Some classy ringback song about gang rape* You've reached so-and-so. Leave me a message. God bless you, every one of you.

"GOOOOOD MORNING VIETNAM!" {I completely forgot what I called this parent for after hearing their voicemail.}

Or the voicemails you get from them....

"Hey Jenna, it's so-and-so.....BOY, YOU BEST SHUT THE F*** UP. THEY BE THINKING I BE BEATIN' YO ASS!, anyways. Jenna, it's me...."

But my personal favorite is when they cuss you's exciting!

I once had a parent call me every name in the book the moment she saw me. I slammed the door in her face and she came back two hours later.... "Oh hey girl, you're looking so cute today!"  Who is this female?

Or the parent who cussed me out over the phone when her child missed school because she thought we had a snow day. "You know what you need to do? Get up early in the morning and call the TV stations to say if you're open or closed." Okay, homegirl. Let me do that for you. I'm a social worker, not a news reporter.

And then there's that mom who tells me every day that I look like Carrie Underwood. She's quickly becoming one of favorite people....ever......

I'm pretty sure I could write a book about all of the interesting individuals I've worked with the past two years. And that's why I love social work. Sure, I'm passionate about helping those who are high-risk, but I enjoy the excitement that each day brings.

And with that said, I've had too much excitement at work this week... so cheers to the weekend!


Jasmine said...

I cannot stop laughing! Hahaha, I started laughing when I say the title pop up in my reader.


Megan Wadsworth said...

You made my day.

And if only I had someone to tell me I looked like Carrie everyday... lucky! :)

Anonymous said...

I can't even imagine the things you've heard! Glad to know you can find the humor in what can be a very stressful job.

Kalie said...

Haha I really am laughing at my desk over this. I can only imagine the things you deal with. And I think we all understand why the mom who says you look like Carrie Underwood is your favorite!

julia rose. said...

Hahahahaha girl, I can TOTALLY relate. Social worker problems... never a dull moment! However, I need to find someone to tell me I look like Carrie everyday and I'd be set.

Shelley said...

I would NOT be good at your job, haha!

Kristin said...

You have a draining job too!! Props to you!

Jenn @ What You Make It said...

Woooow, unbelievable! My mom is a teacher (slightly different scenario than social worker, but along the same lines of working with parents and kids!) and she had similar things happen to her. One mom stalked her. Another mom yelled in front of the whole school about how bad of a teacher she was because she gave her son the C he deserved. But some of your events - wow. Just. Wow.

Becca Moss said...

Oh my gosh, this post was awesome. Day = Made.